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Offline eber3

Total Posts Last Post Last Seen Joined
4534 11/25/09 19:28:30 11/25/09 19:28:30 10/21/02
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0 0 14
03/17/08
113

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My Bio

My Father was born in the year 54732. He was very discouraged that women of that era refused to participate in natural procreation, prefering to 'grow' their kids in the egg holders of their refrigerators. So, he mind linked to the virtual quantum space internet and after getting permission from its inventor, Al Gore, he downloaded the plans for time travel. His search for a mate started in the 1960s and progressed up till the 1990s. That was when he found Mother. She was giving out something she called five dollar BJs behind the Hooters in Cadillac Michigan. He was in love. She worked cheap. They were married in the Temple of Drugs in the year 2056 in the country of George W. Bush, formerly know as the USA. They went on a drunken honeymoon tour of time which resulted in my being born in the year 17BC. I learned to nurse from a donkey before I could walk. Every time Dad caught Mom selling BJs he would move us to a new era. That is how I recieved a classic Roman, 1980s US, Minotion, Atlantian, Vulcan (yep they're real), George W. Bush, Taco Bell (LOOOOONG story) education. At the age of sixteen I turned to the dark side and fed my parents to the packs of living dead weiner dogs that rule the Earth in 3004. Since then I have been wandering time looking for ways to alter the fabric of time itself! Bowahahahah! Remember when you all lived in the idealic garden named Eden? Of course not! I forced Eve to chow down on that apple. Or how you all lived in perfect peace with nature? Yep, I ruined that too. All it took was one little astroid into the dinosaur era. The Hitler who was a peace loving hippie? The timeline that cured both Aids and cancer? The model in every bed? Nope, no, and nyte. I'm your worst nightmare. A weinie with a time machine.

My Occupation

Freelance breast examiner.

My Hobbies

Drawing breath. Juggling weiners (dogs that is). Spanking Kitties. Scratching myself. And stalking big breasted women.

My yuku Posts

Title Type Date
Re: New Nightmare On Elm Street - New Freddy Reply 11/25/09
Re: So.......The Prisoner remake Reply 11/22/09
Homer Simpson guest starts on "Bones". New Topic 11/14/09
Re: Having a Murphy's Law sort of day Reply 11/14/09
Be a Wal Mart stud. Arrrrrrrooooooooooooooooooooooo! New Topic 10/06/09
Re: 4040 Reply 09/30/09
Re: FLASH FORWARD Reply 09/26/09
Re: 3669 Reply 09/26/09
Re: FLASH FORWARD Reply 09/26/09
Re: 3406 Reply 09/25/09

I will make examples of all my friends

eber3 has 16 toes

Hate mail from the masses

Leave a comment

  1. avatar

    Diana Luna

    User Infostatus offline18 Kudos

    06/28/08

    Hi!

    06/30/08

    Reply from eber3:

    Well hi there! image
  2. avatar

    LauraPowers85

    User Infostatus offline69 Kudos

    06/10/08

    haha yup! Fun is def being had! The european football matches just started and everynight people yre flying flags and honking horns and singing songs. I can esp hear all the ruckus since I live in a bar neighborhood.

    Thanks eber! Now get the fuck out of my bed.

    Original comment »
  3. avatar

    PiggiesR4Me

    User Infostatus online20666 Kudos

    06/04/08

    Passing through with friendly...

    image


  4. avatar

    LauraPowers85

    User Infostatus offline69 Kudos

    03/22/08

    How stupid of me not to realize. Maybe my brain is becoming addled due to avoidance of all school-related responsibilities this spring break =P What will all the little children do now? Learn about JESUS??? Psshhhh
    Original comment »
  5. avatar

    LauraPowers85

    User Infostatus offline69 Kudos

    03/22/08

    What the hell is your icon of? Overdosed roadkill? =p

    03/22/08

    Reply from eber3:

    Lol, that's the Easter bunny! He got creamed in the road. See the basket and broken easter eggs laying all around his furry little corpse?image
  6. avatar

    meqal

    User Infostatus offline182 Kudos

    03/11/08

    LOL, and here's your dancing banana. image



    Original comment »
  7. avatar

    meqal

    User Infostatus offline182 Kudos

    03/10/08

    image


  8. avatar

    LauraPowers85

    User Infostatus offline69 Kudos

    03/09/08

    I DON'T FORGIVE YOU! I saw there were like 6 new comments, I thought 'wtf... I'm loved!' Now I'm just slightly loved/stalked by one person. That's pretty cool too! haha! But no worries, eber, I wondered why my comments weren't showing up on people's profiles too. Wish there was a function that said "hey, you submitted your comment, but it needs to be approved first!"
  9. avatar

    meqal

    User Infostatus offline182 Kudos

    03/04/08